Nightmares

My nightmares have jolted me awake the last, hell, almost 2 years. They've been worse than ever this past week. In the last four days alone I've maybe gotten seven hours of sleep. The imagery and the undeniable pain that goes along with these nightmares are nearly indescribable. The best way I can try to explain it, is to share the image I see in a particular moment in my nightmares. A sharp serrated blade ripping up from my foot, twisting through my knee at its end. My muscles and nerves being torn from my flesh and bone. Not dissimilar to that of a fish being gutted. It takes every ounce of my being to steady my breathing after screaming myself awake. Followed by being unable to fall back asleep while the pictures are seared into my eyelids. All I can hope for is one peaceful nights sleep. Writing about it helps a little as I would hate to bottle all of that up. At least this gets it out of my head for awhile. 

Abideen

I'm making a fast friend here in the community room. There is a quite old man from Afghanistan, his primary language is Persian and his English is quite broken. That hasn't stopped him from trying to be personable and kind. He brought over blueberry scones for us to share as we watched Wheel of Fortune together. Halfway through the show a deaf gal came into the room and Abideen was able to sign in ASL to speak with her easily. I find this so amazing that a man who came to America knowing no English was able to learn Sign Language to help him learn to communicate. There is something so beautiful about two people from two backgrounds and cultures being able to get to know each other when it would be so easy for either of them to be secluded. 

Over the last half hour or so, roughly 5 people have come into the community room and Abideen as perked up and said hello to all of them by name and they all respond with genuine happiness. My hope is that even a fraction of my generation can be as kind and warm as him when we reach his age.

Today, Abideen has taught me a few new words in sign language and how to write my name in Persian. He has also taught me how kindness can impact different people and bring a smile to peoples faces. What a good day!